bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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