New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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