I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i dont even know how to be here
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
did you just send me my own nude
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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