Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
You did what with his pubic hair?
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