JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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