Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
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