So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize