Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
