In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Randomize
