i think my tv is drunk
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
