how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
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