Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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