The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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