remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
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