OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
