Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize