Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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