If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my being single is dangerous.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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