theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
