I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Randomize