When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
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I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
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Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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