OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
