Need sex. Gaining weight.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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