Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize