At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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