yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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