he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
