Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
NoShamevember. You game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize