Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.