have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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