What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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