im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Randomize
