u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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