i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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