there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
