Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
