a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
The struggles of a small town man whore
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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