I want to make a zoo with you.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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