You work out of a Hotel?
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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