I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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