I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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