Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
