he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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