I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
How does it feel to date your dad?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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