If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Randomize
