Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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