Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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