Having a random hookup so left but love u
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize