Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
that is very illegal...i love you.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize