My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
"it" just moved
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
